Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Vasantha's interests



Here is one article of Vasantha entitled Kasty my Labrador. She was very fond of the dogs. I also found a very old photo of Vasantha as she used to be during her school/college days and when I first met her, way back in 1963!

Wedding of K Mani's daughter

These invitations are for the wedding of my uncle KMani's daughter. My uncle died recently. He was a very talented person, who unfortunately, did not live up to his potential, possibly due to family circumstances and lack of guidance. I knew him as a very charming person, full of mischief and very child like in simplicity. I don't know how many knew him as he was known to me. Probably nobody.

Ramani and Rajam's wedding


This is the invitation for the wedding of my brother in law Ramani and Rajam. This took place in Lalgudi sometime after my marriage to Vasantha. The thing I most vividly recall of this marriage is the sudden illness of Ramani, the bridegroom, after being food poisoned eating some 'vada' at a wayside resturant and the talk that this resulted in this small town. Rajam is no longer alive. She died more than a year ago, of cancer, after fighting it bravely for a long time. Ramani now lives in Bangalore with his son and grandchildren.

Ganesh's shastiabdapoorthi (Sixty years)


Though I did not want any celebration after attaining 60 years of age, especially since my wife Vasantha was not alive, I was overruled by elders and so the celebration did take place at Delhi. Here is a invitation card issued on that ceremony. This is also the first invitation issued by Jawahar and Gayatri.

Kunjammal's wedding


This is a copy of the invitation card sent out for the wedding of my Chithi, i.e my mother's younger sister, named Kunjammal. I believe she used to play the violin in her younger days. When I knew her, she had a problem with her legs. She was very hospitable and used to make me lots of things to eat. Her husband, Krishnamoorthy was a very happy go lucky person, very fond of children. He used to spoil us with treats! Their children live in Chennai today. How happy they would be to see this blog!

Santhanaraman wedding


This pertains to the wedding of my eldest uncle, Santhanaraman in 1938. As far as I can recollect, nobody probably has a copy of this invitation in their records.

Births in the family-ceremonies connected



Seemandham is a ceremony that is celebrated when the lady in question is about seven months pregnant. Assembled relatives and friends wish her well on the occasion. In our family records, invitations to two such ceremonies, have been found and they are being reproduced here for your perusal.
I wonder whether hindu communities in the north of india also observe such ceremonies; probably they do. What about other communities/other religious denominations?

Ganesh's marriage and HSMani


HSMani was my best friend. I say 'was' since he died nearly two years ago after a sudden attack of pneumonia. We were colleagues first and roommates later. When I got selected to the Indian Administrative Service, he was about the most visibly happy person I saw. When I got married to Vasantha, whom he also knew, he could not attend the wedding, but wrote a poetic piece, which I have preserved to this day. It is in tamil, a language that Mani was very proficient in.

Siva Meena marriage


My youngest brother, Sivakumar got married to Meenakshi of Madurai at Chennai. This marriage, I remember, for various reasons, the chief of them being that everybody was so relaxed and so happy- unlike in most marriages. Siva, a dentist, and Meena now live in Tamil Nadu, both teaching in private medical institution.

GMani's marriage


My brother GMani got married to Banu of Valavanur village. Banu's cousin, Sunderrajan, happened to be my batchmate in the IA&AS, so it was a pleasant experience to meet him at the wedding. Mani and Banu live in Chennai now, after quite a bit of living in Chandigarh and Delhi, besides Nigeria.

Vimala's birth



I did come across this amazing letter written by grandfather announcing to my father that a daughter (Vimala) has been born. It is written in a highly stylized form of tamil that was in vogue then. How many can claim to have letter this old and this significant?

Vimala's Wedding

My sister, Vimala and Radhakrishnan, were married in Chennai. I remember the occasion very well, for I had but come briefly for the ceremonies and everything happened so quickly. Vimala and her husband are happily settled in Chennai itself, after spending time in Bombay, Bhopal etc. Their children, Madhu, Sugan and Mahesh are in Dubai, USA and Germany respectively.

Jawahar and Gayatri's marriage


My son, Jawahar and Gayatri got married at Chennai on 4th March 2001. Jawahar's mother, Vasantha had died the previous september but her shadow was very much present at the ceremony. The wedding was attended by most of our relatives. Jawahar and Gayatri now live with their 2 year old son, Gautam, in Cambridge, U.K.

Jawahar's Upanayanam


Brahmins in India set a lot of store by the ceremony of wearing the sacred thread. This ceremony is called the Upanayanam. It is supposed to keep the young mind trained to discipline through medidation of the sacred Gayatri mantra. Jawahar had his Upanayanam at Chennai in my Housing Board Flat and it was like a marriage without a bride! This was preceded with Grahapravesham of the flat, so there were two days of festivities. Now the flat is sold and only the memory of that flat and the Upanyanam ceremony exists.
Nowadays it is become the fashion for youngsters to refuse to have an upanyanam and parents do not want to impose any such discipline on their young. I, for one, still think that there is considerable merit in these proceedings and it has tremendous impact on the young mind. I wonder how many will agree with this!

In Memorium Vasantha Ganesh


Vasantha died on 30th September 2000 at Apollo Hospital, New Delhi, following complications from kidney transplant. She was a very graceful and kind person. Everybody who came into contact with her remembered her helping attitude and her cheerful disposition. I was absolutely devastated even though I had watched her deteriorate and was hoping against hope that she would somehow get better. Now it is nearly ten years on, but the pain of separation still is still fresh.

Ganesh and Vasantha's marriage



I, Ganesh, got married to Vasantha in 1967 just after I got into the Indian Administrative Service. As Vasantha used to say, she was senior to my service, albeit by a couple of months! How I met her and how we decided to get married, and how we succeeded in obtaining our parents' consent to our wedding, would make many a popular soap opera to shame! Suffice to say that we were fortunate in having found each other and having spent nearly thirty four years together in matrimony. The marriage ceremony was performed in Palani- a small town at the foothills of a hillock called Palani, after the temple devoted there to Kartikeyan, son of Shiva, who assumed the form of an ascetic. Why the marriage was performed there and not in Chennai or Delhi, where the two interested parties lived, is a bit of mystery till today. All that I know is that one old lady, who was grandmother of sorts to Vasantha, declared that she had vowed to get Vasantha married at Palani. With nobody there, my father in law had lots of problems organizing the marriage and many of my relatives did not show up. The place was very hot anyway, for any decent person to get married , especially in front of a blazing fire and three hours of prayers. What I particularly remember is that we had to trek up the hillock in torrid heat on 28th May immediately after the marriage vows, in full regalia and getting our feet blistered and being stared at by a host of people, who liked tamashas! Hardly the stuff that marriages should be made of, but what can one do? Vasantha and I bore all this, she silently and I vocally, but that was the price we had to pay if we wanted to get married!

Marriage of Jaya and Krishnamurthy



My sister Jayalakshmi or Jaya as she was called, got married to Shri Krishnamurthy. This was the first marriage in our family and so we listened to a lot of advice, many of them unwarranted! I was happy about Jaya, my sister, getting married as it would mean that now onwards I would be the eldest and could order others with no prospect of having my ears screwed! At the moment of blogging this, my sister has been dead for almost six months- God Bless her!

Grahapravesham


Grahapravesham or House Warming is a very auspicious ceremony in India. It is at once a statement of having arrived and an occasion for showing off to friends and relatives! My father and mother were justifiably proud of having constructed their own house in an upmarket suburb of Chennai or Madras City as it was known then. One reason could be that they had started out with practically nothing in the way of material possessions, once my father had quarreled with his elder brother, and walked out of their home. I remember the pride with which I showed invitees around the house, having played no mean part in facilitating its construction. I say this because my father was transferred out of Chennai, the moment the construction started and I, as the eldest son, had to shoulder all the responsibility of arranging for cement, steel, bricks and sand for construction. It was sad that we had to sell the house in five years' time, since we couldn't afford to repay the loan taken for construction. But that house, where I spent considerable part of my growing up, will remain in my memory for a long time.

St.John's Ambulance Service


To aid in British War effort, employees of British India's offices were trained in Ambulance Services. This was compulsory for all employees, and so my father, Shri Gopalan attended one such course. It meant staying in military camp and eating food served there, which was mostly non-vegetarian. My father, who was a strict vegetarian, managed to get somebody called Thirvenkatam to bring him food from home. Thirvenkatam brought the home cooked food for father very willingly, because he got to eat the non-vegetarian food dished out by the military canteen! I found, among my father's papers, when he died at the ripe age of 90 years, a certificate from St. John's Ambulance, which I have copied for your viewing.

Eightieth Birthday of Shri Gopalan



Attaining eighty years is still a landmark in one's life. In the traditional south indian brahmins, this landmark is celebrated by the children. It is possibly the only function where the birthday boy and his spouse (that is, if he is lucky to have her by his side) bless the invitees, save the few older persons, from whom they seek blessings. If the birthday boy has a wife living, they once again renew their marriage vows, looked upon by amused children and grandchildren, and even great grandchildren. Such celebrations are few, since both husband and wife don't survive when the husband reaches eighty years. Some are unfortunate, in not having their children celebrate such an event. But that is the way of the world!
Shri Gopalan, my father and Rukmani, my mother were fortunate that they celebrated the sadabhishekam with their children making all the preparations. They were bathed in the holy waters of the Cauvery and Ganges Rivers in front of everyone present.
What lovely memories are embedded of this happy occasion!

Sixtieth Birthday of Shri Gopalan


Nowadays, completing sixty years of existence is nothing much to write about; however, in the old days, this was a landmark. Traditionally, sixtieth birthday of a man is celebrated with prayers for his longevity and thanksgiving. There is also a social side to the celebrations; the bride and the bridegroom renew their marriage vows. It is a quaint ceremony where the children get to witness their parents' marriage (or what it would have been like)! The bride blushes like a small teenaged girl, and the bridegroom is conscious of all the attention that he gets at this juncture. I don't know if this sort of ceremony exists in other countries- if that were to exist, I would certainly like to more about it.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Gopal and Rukmani's wedding 1933



I unearthed an invitation for the wedding of Shri Gopal and Rukmani, my parents, which was in 1933. According to my mother, the wedding was a five day affair. One day, the bridegroom was taken in procession and on another, the bride was taken out in a procession, wearing a male garb. From Phaetons to horse drawn coaches to buses and pleasure cars, the bridegroom's party members were free to use any of these means of transport to reach the bride's place. In accordance with those times, the bride and bridegroom did not meet each other till the actual marriage ceremonies began. In the present case, the bride was all of 13 years old and the bridegroom nearly 19 years old. The bride had studied up to 8th class while the bridegroom had passed his high school and was denied further permission to study. Both my parents shared a very happy marriage which lasted 69 years. Father died in 2002 while my mother, God bless her, is still alive, a sprightly 90 years. Now, look at the invitation itself. It was fashionable then, as it is now, to print an english version of the invitation on one side while the main pages were in highly sanskritised tamil. The names of the bride and the bridegroom are not visible in the english version since a tape used to keep the page together has stuck so well. Now look at the invitation. I wonder how many invitation cards from 1933 or earlier have so far survived!